Sunday, August 19, 2012

The Coach...

One day in the land of twitter an account was made. Matt Turner was his name. While nobody knew it yet this account was one day going to be a great twitter account. It was going to be a twitter account that would protect the innocent from the evil trolls and fill the hate filled internet with kindness in his tweets of "Hi" and "Weeeeeeeeeeeeee". They say he slayed a dragon and killed 50 zombies with one tweet. They say he came from this strange land of "Tennessee". This land was filled with evil. He watched as friends and family were reduced to tears by endless trolling. He couldn't take anymore. One day he vanished and nobody knew where he had gone. Little did they know he ventured off into the lands of the smokey mountains. It was there he honed his skills. He took on the trolls there and bested them at their own games. He would trick them into believing they had won the battle but at one last moment...one last tweet they would be quickly vanquished by the mighty tweeter. Matt Turner returned to his home...but he was different...stronger. He came home as COACH MATT TURNER! Coach Matt Turner was feared among the land of Tennessee and quickly the trolls were driven out and peace had been brought to the land Coach Matt Turner moved on to a new land known as Basketball Twitter. It was hear he found new enemies to slay and new friends to protect. All was well in basketball and there was peace. Until one day a dark...evil twitter account was born...some fear to say his name. They fear saying it will utter his appearance in your mentions...Donuts was born. Quickly Donut spread fear through the land of basketball twitter. Nobody was safe from his trolling. All tweets that were once posted without a thought had 2nd guessing to them "Will this attract the beast?" they would say. "If it did I will surely parish"...but one twitter account stood alone. One twitter account was willing to take on the beast. It was Coach Matt Turner of course. The battle raged for months...some say years. Then one day in an effort to draw out the beast Coach Matt Turner informed twitter of a youtube video that he was in. Donut immediately sprung on the tweet saying he will find it. For what purpose? We don't know. Maybe he wanted to show the world as to embarrass the mighty warrior? Or maybe it was for his own sick reasons...whatever the reason he went out to find it. Never had Donut been so determined to find this video. But he couldn't...he posted a video about Teen Sex at Franklin High School (It was disturbing) and Coach Matt Turner just shook his head no. "I GIVE UP!" yelled Donut. Victory was Coach Matt Turners! Basketball Twitter was safe once more. If ever a twitter account calls out for help Coach Matt Turner will be there. If a troll thinks they can troll the innocent Coach Matt Turner will stop them. Coach Matt Turner. A hero.

If you want to follow either of the twitter accounts mentioned above they are @CoachMattTurner and @2Rollz

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